What the poo?

It's a great question. It has multi-purpose uses. It can be used in any of a number of scenarios. It's good for a laugh for those who haven't heard it. And best of all, it can be said in front of anyone. . .including my psuedo-niece who, although can't understand a word of what anyone says (because she's 2 months old) she still has a firm grasp of the concept of poo.

I cannot believe the amount of times I hear swear words throughout the day. At work, at school, at any store, on the soccer field, it goes on and on and on. Can someone please explain to me the value of swearing? Can someone please tell me how it makes you "cooler"? It does me no good to hear about your ____ parents, or your dissappointment when you miss a shot on goal, or when you drop something, or describing an ex. (You're the one who CHOSE to go out with them, remember?) It actually makes things worse. If you swear around me, I pretty much stop listen. I can pretty much guarantee that instead of processing what you're saying and how I'm going to decide if I'm going to response and how, I am now thinking: oh my goodness, why did that person just swear when we're swapping auto horror stories. Could it really have been that bad? Was I just subjected to lazy vocabulary? That probably means they're going to do it again huh?

Can someone explain to the rest of the world that, although you hit a yellow light, it's only going to slow you down by 2 minutes at the most. Next time, leave 2 minutes earlier. (myself included) I have always said that the only time I swear is in traffic. Don't ask me why. Maybe it's because I seem to be the most competant driver out there these days. . .and even that's debatable from people who have been my passengers. Case in point: my sister's POV is something to the effect of: "You drive like an old woman." A friend's POV: "I want you to drive me to the hospital when I go into labor because you have a lead foot."

And even if you can't stop swearing, maybe try substitute words, or swearing in a foreign language to ween yourself off if you can't stop cold turkey. How about these suggestions: 'freakin', 'shite', 'bizzo', 'heck' and 'darn it' for starters. Once we've reached the substitution level, then we can discuss what's next. Here are some of my favorites that I like to use often: Holy Moly!, Good Gravy, Oh Gosh Yeah. . .and not forgetting the best one: What the poo?